She's in Melbourne
All these years, I did not bother finding out more. I did snoop around her friends' Facebook accounts for any new pictures or updates, and the last I saw of her was in Nov '12, in some pictures of her celebrating a friend's birthday. So I pushed her to the back of my mind, insistent that I should try to forget her, especially since we left on such a bad note - breaking up on V-day, when we were so in love with each other?
And without fail, whenever the year-end and its impending doom of festivities comes around...I would think of her. The Christmasses we spent together, the New Years we never get to celebrate, the CNY I brought her once to my family's.
So I dug. And behold, her Linkedin account shows she's been in Melbourne from late 2010 to late 2012. Where she might be now, I have no idea. But I am pretty sure she can't be in Singapore. It's a huge revelation. For the longest time, I have the slightest suspicion that she may be living outside of SG. Her profile picture that showed her at Mido Cafe in HK, her lesbian partner sporting a similar profile picture with the grubby apartments synonymous with HK. Those pictures coincided with the time that she stopped appearing in her ex-colleague's pictures from work in 2009 or 2010. The time that the yearly birthday SMS became no more. She might have gone to HK in 2009, 2010. Then went to Melbourne for 2 years. And maybe, she's back in HK again. How so? Because her professional account shows the office to be in HK and Melb. Or maybe she's still in Melbourne.
Fact is...I never quite forget her. That first date, what was supposed to be a museum visit but became a supermarket-derived picnic-dinner by The Esplanade. That look on her face as we shuffle through Esplanade to get our food at Marina Square - that's stuck forever in my head. She's so pretty. If only we can print photos from memories...
This is one of the stupidest things I ever did, breaking up with her at the first sign of trouble in our r/ship. It will be the biggest regret I carry with me to my grave, I am sure. My confidence shaken because I have no idea where I was headed career-wise and her eye starting to wander invoking bad memories of the last tumultuous r/ship.
What's holding me back from reaching out? Well, it's been too long. 7 years since we last saw each other...everything's faded. I still rem the boat ride we took, how we kissed so many times whilst we were supposed to take in the sights at the ACM, our quickies in public. I rem them but does she? She must be so angry, so hurt. Why would she not? She must be trying so hard to erase them from memory.
Besides, 7 years she must have met someone. Even if she does not, she seems quite content to have that lesbo around. Back in 2008, I caught a glimpse of her bringing the butch to a friend's wedding. What's that supposed to mean?
She must have forgotten about me...wanting nothing to do with me. To get out of your comfort zone, to live in another country and be away for 2-3 years really says a lot. A lot that has nothing to do with me. And why should it in the first place?
And without fail, whenever the year-end and its impending doom of festivities comes around...I would think of her. The Christmasses we spent together, the New Years we never get to celebrate, the CNY I brought her once to my family's.
So I dug. And behold, her Linkedin account shows she's been in Melbourne from late 2010 to late 2012. Where she might be now, I have no idea. But I am pretty sure she can't be in Singapore. It's a huge revelation. For the longest time, I have the slightest suspicion that she may be living outside of SG. Her profile picture that showed her at Mido Cafe in HK, her lesbian partner sporting a similar profile picture with the grubby apartments synonymous with HK. Those pictures coincided with the time that she stopped appearing in her ex-colleague's pictures from work in 2009 or 2010. The time that the yearly birthday SMS became no more. She might have gone to HK in 2009, 2010. Then went to Melbourne for 2 years. And maybe, she's back in HK again. How so? Because her professional account shows the office to be in HK and Melb. Or maybe she's still in Melbourne.
Fact is...I never quite forget her. That first date, what was supposed to be a museum visit but became a supermarket-derived picnic-dinner by The Esplanade. That look on her face as we shuffle through Esplanade to get our food at Marina Square - that's stuck forever in my head. She's so pretty. If only we can print photos from memories...
This is one of the stupidest things I ever did, breaking up with her at the first sign of trouble in our r/ship. It will be the biggest regret I carry with me to my grave, I am sure. My confidence shaken because I have no idea where I was headed career-wise and her eye starting to wander invoking bad memories of the last tumultuous r/ship.
What's holding me back from reaching out? Well, it's been too long. 7 years since we last saw each other...everything's faded. I still rem the boat ride we took, how we kissed so many times whilst we were supposed to take in the sights at the ACM, our quickies in public. I rem them but does she? She must be so angry, so hurt. Why would she not? She must be trying so hard to erase them from memory.
Besides, 7 years she must have met someone. Even if she does not, she seems quite content to have that lesbo around. Back in 2008, I caught a glimpse of her bringing the butch to a friend's wedding. What's that supposed to mean?
She must have forgotten about me...wanting nothing to do with me. To get out of your comfort zone, to live in another country and be away for 2-3 years really says a lot. A lot that has nothing to do with me. And why should it in the first place?
posted by Ming at 11:42 PM
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